life, as we see it

To pray effectively for 4.4 million people in Bosnia and Herzegovina (BiH) we need to think in threes:

1) Ethnically, Bosnia and Herzegovina are essentially Bosniaks, Croats or Serbs.

2) Religiously, these three groups are predominantly Muslim Bosniaks, predominantly Roman Catholic Croats, and predominantly Orthodox Serbs.

3) Bringing the Good News to a Bosnian is difficult from the human point of view. Becoming a Christian is likened to changing ones nationality. Giving up ones ethnical background is equal to betrayal.

After the bloody civil war in the early 1990s, the country of Bosnia and Herzegovina emerged as a new nation. For the first time after nearly fifty years of living under Tito's communism and the suppression of religion, people are being suddenly confronted with three questions: "Who am I? What am I? What sets me apart?"

Young and Muslim, Adnan attended an evangelistic summer camp this year. Every morning he joined to study the gospels and learn how Jesus handled people with love. He was very impressed by the things he heard and also the fellowship that he sensed. When asking him if he wanted to consider to start following Jesus, he replied: "I really agree with the things we have read and I like what Jesus did, but I can never become Christian, because I'm born Muslim." This statement depicts just how deep the impact of ethnic Muslim identity has on its people.

In the midst of a nation's identity crisis, God is moving among the Muslims. The Bosnian people are known for their love of relationship, their warm hospitality and their passion for coffee. You'll find many conversations about Jesus taking place in the most informal settings, around living room coffee tables and crowded cafes. Bosnians are coming to the Triune God through Christ and finding a new identity and lasting peace in Him.

Ministries in Bosnia and Herzegovina request your prayers:

* According to estimates by the World Tourism Organization, Bosnia and Herzegovina will have the third highest tourism growth rate in the world by 2020. Let us pray that Christian tourists will spend part of their holiday reaching out in love and also to conduct prayer walks on their travels.

* Pray for the Bosnian Evangelical Student Movement which has 10 study groups all over the country. Give thanks for the increased interest in their work and their faith. Pray that more Muslim students will start to read the Bible with them.

* Pray for the church which is often restricted by tradition and orthodox codes, for the Holy Spirit to bring unity and freedom through the message of the Gospel. (John 6:63, 10:10)

* Pray that the door remains open to share Christ freely with Muslims in this nation.

* Pray for continued peace. Tensions between the three constitutional peoples remain.

Additional Facts

During the war, Middle Eastern nations helped finance and supply the Bosnian Muslims. Some even came to fight themselves and after the war, took Bosnian wives and stayed in the country. Muslim fundamentalists are funneling into the nation, handing out money for children's schooling, widow's pensions and paying women to wear the veil. Bosnia and Herzegovina is a pivotal fault line between the East and West, between Islam and Christianity. It is said that if Bosnia can become a recognized Muslim nation, the door into the rest of Europe will open wide to Islam.

There is a great need for healing and forgiveness over the land. Reconciliation continues to be a ministry focus but requires Godly peace-makers to come between the ethnic and religious divides.

About Bosnia and Herzegovina

Population: 4,613,414 (July 2009 est.) World rank #120

Life expectancy at birth: 78.5 years. World rank #43

Ethnic groups: Bosniak 48%, Serb 37.1%, Croat 14.3%, other 0.6% (2000)
Note: Bosniak has replaced Muslim as an ethnic term in part to avoid confusion with the religious term Muslim - an adherent of Islam

Religions: Muslim 40%, Orthodox 31%, Roman Catholic 15%, other 14%

Languages: Bosnian, Croatian, Serbian

Literacy: 94.4%

**information copied from the website www.30-days.net**

It seems that God is quite the Multi-Tasker. Who knew? In these past 3 months (THREE months?!?!) have been filled with some of the most gut wrenching honesty as God put a mirror to our faces. They have been filled with some of the most random belly-laughs. They have been filled with some of the most exciting sights of transformations into freedom. This have been a FULL 3 months!!

The place Heather and I find ourselves more and more standing before a challenge that asks “will you be satisfied with a partially transformed heart?” We have both been led, sometimes pushed, into a place of CHOOSING to let down the walls of our hearts. Interestingly, it seems that we are learning the same lessons with different formulas…but the outcome is the same: “Will I learn to love with my full heart without fear and with ABANDON?” Specifically for me - I am learning that I cannot love others until I can be the “real me”. I cannot love truly until I use what I am gifted in, show my heart, share my thoughts, BE who God created me to be. In turn, I cannot truly be loved by others if they don’t know who I really am. Which brings to question, how can they know who I really am unless I show it? I have started this path, and the question is always before me….will I be satisfied with a partially transformed heart?

Along with this so-called blooming of the heart, is the actual blooming of SPRING!! Now, don’t be fooled by thinking of Spring in terms of the southern United States. No, no. This is a spring of warm-ER temperatures. We have not seen the other side of 75 F yet, and are still building fires almost every afternoon. HOWEVER, beautiful spring flower are showing up everywhere, along with new people. This past weekend was a huge holiday here, Prvi Maj (aka First May). Now, I kid you not, there was enough grilled meat here in this apartment to equal a combined Memorial Day, 4th of July AND Super Bowl Sunday!!! So the day was filled with food, friends and fun. Heather created a little video for you to check out:

1st May:


As for the freedom, I wanted to share this from a “coffee time conversation” Heather and I were having with Dejana. One thing led to another and soon we were discussing how Dejana’s growth is becoming more evident. Heather and I took a moment to affirm her in how it is so visible that her heart is maturing in grace, loving others, and seeking the deeper meaning behind actions (both her own and of others). Genuinely, through tears, Dejana began to express her heart to the two of us. In a moving moment, she shared her profound gratitude for our willingness to come. She revealed that our leaving our family, friends and comfort zone and choosing to come here spoke to her volumes of just how much God loves her. Dejana said that God knows her struggles, her fears and how lonely she has been. God sent the two of us here for her, and it blew her away at how much it has meant and taught her so far. She told us that for this she is so thankful.

What have we been up to lately? I am so glad you asked. There have been a lot of changes taking place. The days here are filled with more and more sunshine. With that being the case, we wake in the mornings to the baaaaing of sheep, we look out our windows and see large groups of kids gathering before they have to go to school, and we walk down the streets of Breza seeing more faces than we have seen the whole time we have been here. Not only is the town awakening, but the hills are turning green and you can smell growth in the air.
With the changing of the seasons, there have been a couple of adventures! Most recently it rained a lot. The rain aspect of it was really nice, but the flooding that resulted made for quite the evening adventure. The basement of the church flooded, so Christie and I along with Bobo, Dejana, and Remi spent the evening digging trenches, hauling buckets of water to a nearby stream, and quickly moving humanitarian packages out of the way of ruin. It made for an evening of laughs and everything turned out fine after 3 hours of hard work.

There are points in my life that I hear God so clearly. For that, I am excited. Some days I find myself ecstatic about the things He is talking to me about and other days it is as if I hear but do not want to respond because of fear of what it will change. I have come to find that I like comfort. I like knowing what is going to happen after I make a decision, my dad has taught me to analyze things all too well. But, there is a line. It is a line that makes all the difference in the outcome of the race. Will I choose to take part in the race and experience the joys of the trials and pains of being a forerunner of the pack, or will I sit back and choose to start when I have analyzed the ramifications.
One thing I have come to realize is that once I have decided to be in a race and I am on that line, there is only one thing I need to listen for…the caller. It is the caller who tells me what race I am in, where I am in the race, and when the race is complete.
In the past I have often been the runner on the line with a delayed start. I wasn’t on the mark and ready to go. I was on the mark physically but sometimes not mentally and emotionally. These past few weeks I have come to realize the effect this is having on THE RACE.
The Heart, it is very important when running a race. It is the source of life of the body. Without it, you cannot breathe or function. I have found that I have been living with heart failure. Parts of my heart have been arrested with bitterness, jealousy, envy, and even fear. Because of this, I have not been in the race and I have been affecting everyone else who is in the race as well.
Through these last couple of days I have been able to search my heart and see the wicked things within me. I have been sifted. I have repented and I have forgiven.
More alive and able to breathe, I press on.
-Heather

Over a year and a half ago, I remember wrestling with God about having to grown up. I was ending my college career in another 2 semesters, I was having to make plans for over in my future, and I was beginning to have to face reality as I SAW IT TO BE. I told God that I wasn’t very interested in growing up but rather that I would like to be 7 years old instead. He asked me why. “Because at 7 my parents woke me up every morning, told me what I would be doing that day, made sure I got there, and provided everything I needed as far as food and clothing etc. At the end of the day I could go back home and go to sleep without a worry of what would happen the next day. I knew that they would be there again in the morning to give me direction and provision.” To that, He responded by asking me the question, “Why can’t you be 7?” “Because I am 20.” “Why can’t you be 7?” “I told you, because I am 20.” “Heather, why won’t you be 7? Why won’t you wake up every morning and listen for me to tell you what you will be doing each day? Why won’t trust that I will supply all your needs? Why won’t you go to bed at night know that everything is going to be ok and that you will wake up the next morning and I will have everything under control?” To that, I thought “….oh.” In that moment I recognized that I was operating out of fear- doubt- lack of trust. With these responses, I was saying that what God said time and time again throughout the Bible about taking care, proving, and guiding was not true. I was calling God a liar! I decided to become 7.
I feel like I have hit a growth spurt. Since I have been here there have been SO MANY things that God has been teaching me about. Anything from not being concern about money, Hearing His word and taking action in it, Allowing God to pursue me… oh and there are more. But, the one that I think is the biggest one thus far has been the one I learned today.
In the book Bravehearts by Sharon A. Hersh, the author makes this statement, “God longs to tear down perfectionism in our lives so that HE might be the covering.” At the time I initially read this, I really didn’t think too much about it. I wrote it in my journal and then returned to it today as I was looking over a few things I had written. It was then that it hit me. Perfectionism is not only having to make sure every fork is completely straight on the napkin next to the dinner plate or turning in all your homework on time and receiving good grades. Perfectionism includes anything thing that I try to make myself or others do, be, or fit into being. It is setting a standard that can’t be met because we are human and not God. I realized that I have come to a place where I try to make myself and other fit into the mold that I think others look for. In the words of my journal entry,
“One thing I know about myself is that I like things to be the way they “should” be if they can be- until now, I didn’t recognize that as perfectionism. …It’s all selfish really and I realize that it is all based in fear. I like to be able to control the way people feel about me and the way that they look at me. But, what God is telling me now is be yourself, let others be themselves and I WILL DO FOR YOU.”
Now, I choose to not walk in fear anymore, but instead trust that God is in control. In this growth spurt I would like to think that I am no longer now 21 year old Heather, but rather 20 ¾ year old Heather and becoming more and more childlike daily.
-Heather

Before we left, I was in a store and the girl at the counter asked me why I needed all the things I was buying. I quickly responded by telling her that I was going to Bosnia for a year. Her eyes got really big in that moment. Evidently images of thatched huts, roaming pigs, and waste outside my front door flooded her mind. She started asking all kinds of strange questions. I think she thought I was going to live in a jungle somewhere. As we have been writing home telling people about our adventures here thus far, we have come to realize that people are having a hard time picturing what Bosnia looks like and what our living quarters could possibly look like. So, we thought we would make a short little video tour of our apartment! I hope this helps put some of your imaginations to rest-ENJOY!

-heather

This blog was not created for just the fun thoughts, pictures, random videos or interesting finds. It was created to be sort of a live journal, to log all that we see, feel, think and do. After all, it is a journey we are taking. With that in mind… I decided to share with you something that God has been teaching me.

Being here can be very difficult at times. It seems that if you take 100% of what is said in any given day, it will break down into 50% is what you ACTUALLY SAID and 50% is having to repeat it or explain it or reword it. Miscommunication here is more than just an inconvenience; it transcends just “simple language barrier”. There is a deep spiritual issue at play. Ephesians 6:12 says that “we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world”. This is a truth that I accept.

Somewhere along the way I began to have some very passionate disagreements…conducted in silence, of course. I moved from “taking thoughts captive” with grace and began to very religiously “bottle things up”. For 2 weeks I stayed frustrated, felt condemned and felt that the world was against me. At least I could say that I was “taking the high road” and not responding to those silly “attacks”... after all, I do know truth, right?!

Finally things came to a head. I called a friend from home to just seek SOMETHING. I could not hear, or discern, or sort through anything. The forest was too overwhelming for me to see the trees. Truth is what I got, and it stung. It stung a lot. Yet, it was like the sting of a shot you know is going to make you feel better in the end. She says to me, “sounds like you’re full of pride”. (**gasp) On the inside was something like: “WHAT? Are you kiddin’ me?!?! Haven’t you heard me?!?! I am the one that was the most GIVING and the most GRACIOUS and IGNORING the conspiracy that was designed to take me down!! And you’re saying it’s ME?!?” What came out was more like: “uh-huh…ok”

So, I prayed about it; however, I knew that I knew God had used her to pierce my heart with truth. I was being prideful. When I asked Him about it, He confirmed it. Now, in my humbleness I genuinely asked Him to show me my heart and what I cannot see. To the list He added: self-focused, unloving, not encouraging, concerned with appearances, critical, and being a stumbling block. To which my only response was to lie in the floor and say “I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?” and He did. I stood up, dusted myself off, took a deep breath, took back my authority, and repented to whom I’d hurt. I was forgiven.

Joyce Meyer was giving a message (the same day) and said, “You cannot make changes in your own power, or you’d be able to receive the glory. You MUST depend on the GRACE of God to make changes. You cannot change yourself - that is just a decision or suppressing it. By allowing the Holy Spirit to change you in the grace of Gods power and timing, HE will transform you from the inside out. Then everyone will know it could only be God.” [my paraphrasing as close as possible to quoting] Religiously bottling things up will only be in my power and suppression - to take thoughts captive in LOVE and desire to believe the best and honor… that is depending on the Spirit.

On Thursday, I will step on a plane and start the adventure of the next year of my life. As I have been preparing to go, I have been so amazed to see people come around me and be excited about what God is doing in Bosnia. I have been blessed to see them truly have concern for the things that are taking place there and I have been blessed by their self-sacrifice in praying for Christie, myself, and the names heard and faces they have seen in the photographs over the past few years. I am at a place now where people are no longer asking me what I am doing now that I am out of school, but they are asking am I ready for what is coming next. This is a question that honestly for some nights haunted me, “Am I ready?” Ready. After thinking about this word for countless minutes I have come to realize that that is a point I do not know if I will ever reach. To me, this word means that I have all my ducks in a row and have accomplished everything that I had once dreamed of checking off my list before I go. Now I realize that it is not the number of books I have read and the amount of time spent studying about the things that will come that will make me prepared, it is what I do with them. I could have accomplished all the things on my list, I could have prepared in every way, but unless I actively used those things in the furthering of the relationship with God and His kingdom, they are all worth nothing.


I was reading some the other day in the book of Luke chapter 18 and the first verse caught my attention. It says, “…at all times they were to pray and not lose heart.” When reading this, my mind flooded with thoughts. The reason I had set some of the goals I wanted to accomplish before I leave for the year was because I was afraid of what the result would be if I did not accomplish them. I was afraid that I would not be able to carry out the mission that God has set before me. What I realized is that when I get over there, God is in control. If things do not seem to be going the way that I would have planned them, He’s got it; I should not lose heart. If I am having problems in learning the language, I need to stop and pray and ask God to allow me to see the words in a way that will help me to remember them. This pray without ceasing concept is a thing that I have known for years, but it wasn’t until the other day that I realized the connection between prayer and hope. I ask things in prayer believing that God can provide and the result is that through prayer and that willingness to hope in God I am not able to lose heart. Because I am constantly having to believe in my prayers I am constantly having to have hope in the Promise. There is always hope even if I can’t see it.


So, I am walking into this year with hope. I am believing that God is going to accomplish what He is sending us to accomplish. I am believing that I am capable through Him to do those things. I choose to believe and never give up on the hope of God, because it is hope that those people need and it is hope that I need, as well, to survive and live to the fullest.


- Heather

So this guy comes up to me and says, “What’s the vision? What’s the big idea?”
I open up my mouth and the words come out like this... The vision?

The vision is Jesus:
obsessively, dangerously, undeniably Jesus.
The vision is of an army of young people.
You see bones?
I see an army.

And they are free from materialism—
They laugh at 9-5 little prisons.
They could eat caviar on Monday and crusts on Tuesday.
They wouldn’t even notice.
They know the meaning of the Matrix, the way the West was won.

They are mobile like the wind.
They belong to the nations.
They need no passport.
People write their addresses in pencil and wonder at their strange existence.
They are free yet they are slaves of the hurting, dirty and dying.

What is the vision?
The vision is holiness that hurts the eyes.
It makes children laugh and adults angry.
It gave up the game of minimal integrity long ago to reach for the stars.
It scorns the good and strains for the best.
It is dangerously pure.

Light flickers from every secret motive, from every conversation.
It loves people away from their suicide leaps—their Satan games.
This is an army that would lay down its life for the cause.
A million times a day, its soldiers choose to lose that they might one day win the great “well done” of faithful sons and daughters.

Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night.

They don’t need fame from names.
Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds chanting again and again: “COME ON!”
And this is the sound of the underground, the whisper of history in the making, foundations shaking, revolutionaries dreaming once again.
Mystery is scheming in whispers, conspiracy is breathing…
This is the sound of the underground.

And the army is disciple(in)ed—
Young people who beat their bodies into submission.
Every soldier would take a bullet for his comrade at arms.
The tattoo on their back boasts “for me to live is Christ and to die is gain.”

Sacrifice fuels the fire of victory in their upward eyes.
Winners.
Martyrs.
Who can stop them?
Can hormones hold them back?
Can failure succeed?
Can fear scare them or death kill them?

And the generation prays like a dying man with groans beyond talking, with warrior cries, sulfuric tears and great barrow loads of laughter!

Waiting.
Watching.
24-7-365.

Whatever it takes they will give:
Breaking the rules,
Shaking mediocrity from its cozy little hide,
Laying down their rights and their precious little wrongs,
Laughing at labels,
Fasting essentials.
The advertisers cannot mold them.
Peer-pressure is powerless to shake their resolve at late-night parties before the cockerel cries.

They are incredibly cool, dangerously attractive on the inside.
On the outside?
They hardly care!
They wear clothes like costumes: to communicate and celebrate, but never to hide.

Would they surrender their image or their popularity?
They would lay down their lives, swap seats with the man on death row, guilty as hell: a throne of an electric chair.

With blood and sweat and many tears, with sleepless nights and fruitless days, they pray as if it all depends on God and live as though it all depends on them.

Their DNA chooses Jesus. He breathes out. They breathe in.
Their subconscious sings. They had a blood transfusion with Jesus.

Their words make demons scream in shopping malls.
Don’t you hear them coming?

Herald the weirdoes!
Summon the losers and the freaks.
Here come the frightened and forgotten with fire in their eyes!
They walk tall and trees applaud.
Skyscrapers bow.
Mountains are dwarfed by these children of another dimension.

Their prayers summon the Hound of Heaven and evoke the dream of Eden.

And, this vision will be.
It will come to pass.
It will come easily.
It will come soon.

How do I know?
Because, this is the longing of creation itself, the groaning of the spirit, the very dream of God.

My tomorrow is His today.
My distant hope is His 3-D.
And, my feeble, whispered, faithless prayer invokes a thunderous, resounding, bone-shaking, great “AMEN!” from countless angels, from heroes of the faith, from Christ himself.

And He is the original dreamer, the ultimate winner.
Guaranteed.

--The Vision